And often, your confidence is damaged not by the things other people say to you — but the things you say to yourself. You know what the likely truth is? You are the only person who sees it that way. Everyone else probably recognises the competent, good person you really are.
And second, also just like with any other skill, you can get better at communication through practice. Try these tips:. When people feel shy, they might hesitate to say or do something because they're feeling unsure of themselves and they're not ready to be noticed. New and unfamiliar situations can bring out shy feelings — like the first day of school, meeting someone new, or speaking in front of a group for the first time.
People are more likely to feel shy when they're not sure how to act, don't know how others will react, or when attention is on them. People are less likely to feel shy in situations where they know what to expect, feel sure of what to do or say, or are among familiar people. Like other emotions, shy feelings can be mild, medium, or intense — depending on the situation and the person. Someone who usually or often feels shy might think of himself or herself as a shy person.
People who are shy may need more time to get used to change. They might prefer to stick with what's familiar. People who are shy often hesitate before trying something new. They often prefer watching others before joining in on a group activity. They usually take longer to warm up to new people and situations. Sometimes being quiet and introverted is a sign that someone has a naturally shy personality. But that's not always the case. Being quiet is not always the same as being shy. Shyness is partly a result of genes a person has inherited.
It's also influenced by behaviors they've learned, the ways people have reacted to their shyness, and life experiences they've had. Many people want to reduce their shyness. But people who are naturally shy also have gifts that they might not appreciate in themselves. For example, because shy people may prefer listening to talking, they sometimes become really good listeners and what friend doesn't appreciate that?!
People who are shy might also become sensitive to other people's feelings and emotions. Because of their sensitivity and listening skills, many people with a shy personality are especially caring toward others, and interested in how others feel. People often consider them the finest friends. It may also be one of the causes of social anxiety.
Shyness can vary in strength. Many people feel mild feelings of discomfort that are easily overcome. Others feel extreme fear of social situations, and this fear can be debilitating. Inhibition, withdrawal from social activities, anxiety , and depression can result from shyness. Shyness encompasses a broad spectrum of behaviors. Perceptions of shyness may also be cultural. Some cultures, such as many of those in the United States, tend to regard it negatively.
Others, such as some Asian cultures, tend to regard shyness more positively. About 15 percent of infants are born with a tendency toward shyness. Research has shown biological differences in the brains of shy people. But a propensity for shyness also is influenced by social experiences. Parents who are authoritarian or overprotective can cause their children to be shy. A warm, caring approach to rearing children usually results in them being more comfortable around others.
Schools, neighborhoods, communities, and culture all shape a child. Connections a child makes within these networks contribute to their development.
If just a little shy, you probably experience an occasional sense of being uncomfortable in social situations.
Or you may be slow to initiate conversations, at the same time as knowing you'd prefer to be chatting with people. If your feelings are more intense than just being uncomfortable in social situations, this can lead to becoming socially isolated, where you dislike even the thought of meeting people or trying to talk to them.
Though not commonly realised, shyness has physiological and genetic links associated with low self-confidence and aspects of depression, as well as a high degree of self-consciousness.
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